New Balance

The rain falls cold this morning. My throat is sore. We have a whole day of work to do. Some of my staff got home at 2am. Manuals need to be signed. Last week’s pace was embraced by a creative flow. Filled journals. Sketchbooks painted on. I began to understand the rhythm of visual art as it helped me channel my thoughts into words. This week’s rhythm slightly changes. I feel like delving into reading more than drawing. Sometimes I find the changes peculiar and contradicting. I have questions in my head like, “Why do I feel like drawing now and then a week later I feel like reading?” I suppose it is the nature of creativity. A pattern I need to get used to as I continue to integrate my brain into wholeness of thinking and being.

My aunt Elvira left today. She stayed with us for 3 weeks. She visited my Mom and spent time with her. I never thought I’d appreciate her presence so much till this past 3 weeks. It gave me a little bit of breathing room. And I’m sure it helped my Mom because she had company almost every moment.

I’ve had good conversations with my aunt during her stay. I noticed that she really enjoyed talking about the faith. She just recently entered the Third Order of the Carmelites just like my grandmother before her. Her presence was wrapped in peace. She talked about the saints that were dear to her and the moments she found sacred. Those conversations were refreshing. I found her very patient. On days when I would find myself slowly getting impatient with my Mom because of her mood swings, she would sit there quietly observing everything.

Life goes back to normal now. We prepare for Mom’s 3rd chemotherapy cycle this weekend.

I have found a new hobby through biking. I discovered that I enjoyed the wind rushing past when I go downhill. I realized that I should control my breathing when I am going uphill so that I can endure the tension in my legs as I pedal throughout the climb. I realized that Gatorade helps me last longer more than water. And I realized that I need to buy bike lights if I want to keep biking at night.

It’s all about the new balance.


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