Last Minute Realizations on Everyday Things
The past week has gone on with a series of stories and changing events. One minute I'm focusing on counting machine hours and now I'm focused on understanding the creative industries that the business of my work intersects with.
In the middle of it, I try to keep up with the daily life of a faithful and miss out unfortunately on some of the things that would have increased my understanding about the mysteries of this life. I am beginning to realize that if I want to deeply meditate on the faithful's life, it will take so much time that I need to be doing just that and not do anything else.
I easily get drawn in to things that require pondering. It's almost an addiction. It's like how I prefer to just read instead of go out to the mall and walk around. How I prefer to write instead of engage with conversations that bore me.
I was participating in this Skype conversation between my uncle and my Mom this morning. It was random. They call each other every week and talk about how old they're getting. My uncle's head was covered by a beanie and he was telling us that it's been really cold in Glendale. He says that he used to just go outdoors in a polo-shirt despite the cold weather but now he has to wrap himself snug before he goes to his church to teach catechism to a few a people.
The word Catechism sets my uncle off into this passionate discussion about the mysteries of the faith and how believing in the Church is an everyday decision. Most would probably get turned off and call it preachy. I know I certainly did when I was about 15 years younger. He'd preach to us on a 30 year old swing situated on my grandmother's garden about the tribes of Judah and memorization of Psalms. But I have grown to appreciate these discussions because of one thing. They ground me to the truth. And when you're days are filled with busy activities that make no sense 70% of the time, you would want to start getting your hands on -- what is true and what makes sense.
The world doesn't always completely make sense. It can't. But when you meet people who are like-minded and who understand its mysteries and have an appreciation for the Unseen, it becomes bearable to live everyday waking up at 5:45am to get ready for work.
I'm juggling 4 things right now. I'd like to call them research projects. These are things that I'm trying to wrap my mind around. There's "how to increase my sales"; there's "how to succeed in a creative industry"; there's "how to get young people to be alive in youth ministry"; there's "fulfilling my writing dream". I'm trying to work with categories now because all the things that I'm putting effort on are a variety of activities that do not always intersect. I'm beginning to realize how difficult it is to manage pulling off an activity one after another if they aren't all the same. Oh the many hats I wear!
I'm almost getting use to it. I still get frustrated and cry to the distant moon before I pull the covers over my head at night. But everyday on my drive to work, I pop in a preacher's podcast and let the drive be a moment of grace. There's very little spaces these days where grace can be restored but I suppose I'm glad that I still find them when I need them. Even the last minute.
|a scene from the past work week. we hit our sales target.|