Heaven Sees Me Walking

The week has been my first week outside the work environment I've lived in for 4 years.  I've packed my things in boxes and silently slipped out the door.  A week  before that a team of artists gave me a surprise gathering as a "send off" and a framed caricature of my face with all these handwritten notes thanking me for what I have done for them.

It was an overwhelming feeling to be deeply acknowledged like that and I can only find my words in acts of gratitude.  There is nothing else to say when you know that you haven't been as perfect as you can be yet people see through your imperfections so gracefully and honor the heart you put into the effort.

These are moments that seldom pass ones life but when they do, you can't help but stop and just lift up a song of praise for being affirmed that Heaven sees me walking.

Heaven sees me walking.  Walking above the circumstances that may have brought me down.  Walking above the perceptions.  Walking above the impossibilities.

And today I am just grateful.

Oh, I am so far from where I want to really be.  But for some reason the ambition to get to the destination is no longer as great as the desire to keep being faithful and show up for what I need to do everyday.

And those are little things.  Showing up for prayers  before the break of dawn.  Showing up for journaling the cluttered thoughts.  Showing up for counting the gifts of everyday.  Showing up for reading the living Word. And so on.

Last night I showed up for a moment of remembering some of the old songs I loved.  I went through a playlist of Indigo Girls and felt reconnected to a part of me I've stopped being.  I forgotten how much I loved music.  And while the thought frustrates me how I've abandoned this talent for the sake of earning a living, I am grateful that I still have ears to hear and a cracked raw voice to sing.


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